Grow Big Love
Grow Big Love – Realm of Change
How We Navigate Relationships Is Part of Making Changes
We do not live in isolation, and the incredibly small small number of humans that do will in ALL likelihood never read this. We exist within social structures — families, groups, organizations, cultures, nations, online realities, political frameworks, …. When we begin to make a change, all of our relationships influence us to a high degree. Most of you have heard sayings along the line of, “We are who we hang out with”.
When we want to be successful in making most changes, we have to account for and manage the influences from our relationships.
One of the most influential type of relationship is our significant other. Most of what I offer with Grow Big Love is within the relationship of a significant other. My articles and partnership work relates to our social interactions to a large degree.
Grow Big Love is about loving and being loved, and does not necessarily mean a romantic love.
Go to “Why Blessing Goes Further Than Kindness or Gratitude” …
How I Grow Big Love With Couples
The Quest To Grow Big Love
You can see in the “Grow Big Love” realm on the map above, a journey I have uncovered that supports both partners to come together to grow a sacred passionate partnership. This journey is undertaken within a spirit of good will, as each individual navigates a path to grow with their partner.
I go well beyond the various methodologies out there and instead use a unique approach that supports each partner through the change it takes to transform the relationship into the sacred and inspiring partnership it can be. The partnership takes on a profound meaning that brings each individual together, serving the third entity – the partnership.
Relational Alchemy
Strengthen Your Foundation
- Be Authentic With Yourself
- Be Open And Honest With Your Partner
Deal With Your Backlog of Issues — Uncover, Heal, Mend & Rebuild
- Uncover The Unresolved Issues
- Assess Your Desire to Rebuild Your relationship
- Choose — Deal With The Issues With Your Current Partner or Next
Choose A Meaningful Path Forward: Grow Big Love
- Generate Partnership MOJO
- Uncover & Co-Create the Partnership’s Living Purpose
- Make New Agreements that align with The Living Purpose of Each Partner & the Partnership
How I Work With Partnerships
I no longer offer therapy for individuals, partners, or in groups as used to. Why? I do not need to because in 2003, I discovered what drives all healing, growth, and transformation — something highly effective, swift, long-lasting, and meaningful. Once I employed my answer in 2010, The Paradox Cure, my clients including couples obtained results unprecedented from any modality or approach I had learned, experienced, or researched.
I believe no agent of change, coach or therapist should make choices or give that much advice for individuals or partners, though perhaps recommendations only after each partner has done their work, reflected and come up with their true wants and agenda.
Stage 1 – Each Partner’s Individual Work
To this end, I facilitate individuals and partners to uncover their true desires, which differs from what they initially think they want. I achieve this through a process I developed long ago that uncovers Living Purpose. It involves both self-directed exploration and guided experiential sessions with me.
Once partners come to know more of their deeper truths through Paradox Cure, and their authentic desires and needs through Living Purpose, I can then provide options that align with their authentic wants and explore the potential consequences of those options.
Stage 2 – Unresolved Issues
After each partner has uncovered their authentic wants, needs and Self, the unresolved issues are looked at and choices made how to resolve them, and if each partner will commit to that work or not.
Stage 3 – Partnership as the Third Entity
After that work is in process and a commitment is made to move forward, the most exciting part of the journey begins – generating that full-on passion (MOJO); uncovering the sacred living purpose of the partnership, which breathes massive life and inspiration into each partner; and new agreements that align with each partner AND the partnership to support BIG LOVE!
Imagine BIG LOVE
Imagine Big Love
Do you believe BIG LOVE is possible? Imagine this:
Imagine an attraction so alive and captivating that you yearn to kiss your partner just by glancing at them. Seeing their face, body, or silhouette, or hearing their voice ignites an instant fire of desire, a passion that has remained as big as it was last year, the year before, and so on.
Imagine a commitment to your partner’s health and well-being so unwavering that you’re willing to move mountains, overcoming any obstacle, even when everyone around you advises you to give up, let go, and accept the inevitable.
Imagine a connection so inspiring that it fuels your belief in the impossible. With this unwavering belief, you embark on extraordinary journeys, driven by the strength that only springs from such a profound and purposeful connection.
Imagine a gratitude so immense that you freely give anything and everything to your partner, even when it’s not reciprocated or possible to reciprocate, even after years have passed.
Imagine a companionship so profound that you wake up each day knowing that there’s no one else in the entire world you’d rather share your life with, be with, and share everything with. This bond remains strong even if you’re still grappling with unresolved conflicts from the day before.
Imagine a reverence so complete that it compels you to consider the potential impact of every major and minor decision before making it. You adjust your choices to be positive for your partner, striving to align your actions with their desires and needs.
Imagine a love so selfless that your partner’s happiness, joy, and pleasure are more important to you than your own need to give it to them. You feel deep love and joy knowing that your partner can find happiness and fulfillment from anyone, anything, or anywhere else.
Imagine a romance so magical that it transcends the desire to watch romantic TV shows or movies. The reality of your daily life makes all other romantic stories seem watered down, tawdry, or even absurd.
Imagine a love so powerful that you allow your partner to leave when they make a clear choice to do so. Even though you are devastated, you only wish them well and never wish harm upon them, no matter how angry or hurt you may become.
Imagine a devotion so absolute that you go beyond forgiveness when the unforgivable has occurred. When all seems lost for months, even years, you hold onto a flicker of hope that your partner may one day return, driven by your unwavering devotion that goes beyond reason, beyond doubt, and beyond, beyond.
Few “Experts” Believe BIG LOVE is Sustainable!
I experienced this for over a decade, and it is not just a fantasy. What is more fantastical is how the media and our culture portray romance, coupled with the disinformation from numerous well-intentioned relationship “experts.”
Ultimately, it’s your decision who you choose to guide you through your relationship or partnership. Make an informed choice, as it will significantly impact the success of your partnership.
NOTE: There are some incredible relationship educators and builders out there. Check out The Gottman Institute! https://www.gottman.com. I’m in awe of the founder’s brilliance and the work they’ve accomplished. I’ll be sharing many resources on my upcoming “resource” website.
It is possible to feel and give BIG LOVE, experience it fully, but not have it reciprocated or accepted. A partnership needs each partner to fully participate and accept BIG LOVE if it is to last.
Cultivate A Sacred Passionate Partnership
Imagine a partnership that sustains and deepens an experience of being deeply in love, feeling more physical and emotional desire than the beginning of the relationship, waking up each morning with delight at the prospect of another day with your beloved, and having the same passion for each other decades later.
In this partnership, each is willing to work through challenges and prioritize their partner’s health, well-being, wants, and needs.
This is not depicted in the fairy tales of “happily ever after” because it is based on a different foundation — a foundation with each partner knowing and expressing their LIVING PURPOSE. Together they uncover the partnership’s Living Purpose that transcends their individual lives. Additionally, they use the partnership as a vehicle for healing, growth, and evolution.
What emerges from this deep well of purposeful partnership is BIG LOVE. However, it requires growth, cultivation, nurturing, and care throughout its life, similar to a garden. When nurtured properly, this kind of partnership inspires many and ignites hope that something truly exists beyond the confines of our fairy tales, movies, books, and most stories.